Reviewer's select any
Evolution Card and take another look.
Ratings are based on a 1 to 5 scale
1 being the worst. 3 ... average.
5 is the highest rating.
Race: Beast Folk
Evolution-Put on one of your beast folk
When this creature is tapped, each other of your
Beast Folk get +2000 power
Artist: Tsutomu Kawade
Drizer's Flavor Text (For cards that don't have
them): - Flavor Text: "Rage leads to war. War leads
to rage. Isn't it magical?"
-General Dark Fiend
AWESOME! Today, (thanks to Nimbly) I got to review
whatever evo I felt like.
Well, what better card to review then one of the
cheapest and (in my
opinion) the most potential evo. By the way, sorry
for no review Monday, I got my calendar email late
and didn't have time to check it because I'm kinda
addicted to MVP Baseball 2005. Oh well, I'm here for
awhile now. TO THE REVIEW!
Good Points of the Card
-VERY Good power for cheap cost
-Attack on the first turn
-Gives other Beast Folk +2000
Can you say "BROKEN?" Let's all say it now:
"Bro-ken" Honestly, this is still one of the best
cards out in the game even though it's from evo.
This card was totally brought back with the release
of Torcon and has been rolling ever since. I can
promise you, when the new set comes out, this card
won't slow down at all. I don't really have much to
say about Barkwhip.
Ok, let's do my "simulation game"
Turn 1: Lay mana
Turn 2: Summon either Torcon, Mane, or Mushroom (lay
extra for Mushroom) Turn 3: Play BAT if you played
mushroom and evo to Barkwhip or if you played a
Beast Folk, evo to Barkwhip right away.
The PERFECT card for those beast folk rush deck,
I'll tell ya, if your drafting with evo, and you got
a Beast Folk, draft this. If your trying to play
strategectically (is that a word?) I would take him
just so he wouldn't be used against me, because I
would be scared outta my pants when he hits the
feild on turn 3 possibly
Bad Points of the card
-Eh.., no Beast Folk 1 drop yet?
This is still one of the most deadliest cards
Constructed:5.0 Totally Broken here, especially when
Limited: 4.5 Only because you might not draft or get
a beast folk to evo
Art: 3.6 SMASH, SMASH, SMASH
Pretty much wraps it up for Barky,
another free-choice day. We are to review
our favorite evolution creature. Goody!
Until a few months ago, I didn’t trust
evolution creatures. I figured the fact
that they required a lower level monster on
the field to evolve from was a huge minus.
Further, I figured their abilities were just
not worth it in most cases. Sure, they
didn’t have summoning sickness, but what was
so great about that?
Blocker decks started ripping my Dark Tide
deck a new one, and I really had no way to
fight them. Finally, in an act of
desperation, I threw in some Aqua Jolters,
and my two Crystal Paladins. This was the
BEST decision of my dueling life. I started
to dismantle those blocker decks, and even
after the age of the blocker passed, I kept
on using them. Their haste ability was
excellent, and it was powerful enough to win
many battles. I fell in love with this
Type: Evolution Creature
Race: Liquid People
on one of your Liquid People.
When you put
this creature into the battle zone,
return all creatures in the battle zone
that have "blocker" to their owners'
Text: “I love
the ocean! I love fish! I love rocks! I love
being an artificial monstrosity constructed
by the Cyber Lords! Everything is great!”
This guy made me love
evolution creatures. To this day, he is the
only one I have run at a tournament. To
this day, he has won me an UNHOLY amount of
games. Let’s discuss why I love this guy
for a minute.
Civilization/Race: He’s a water card.
Civilization really doesn’t matter except in
extreme circumstances. His race is Liquid
Person. Liquid People are some of the best
cards in the game. Hulcus, Guard, and
Jolter see quite a bit of play. His effect
plays well with other water cards. Score
good points here.
He costs four mana, plus whatever the
creature you evolve him from costs.
Generally, to one turn evo him, you can
evolve a guard for five mana, or evolve a
Hulcus/Jolter for Seven. Definitely
doable. His ability is great for his cost,
and his power level is fine too.
He can kill all creatures in the 2000 and
under bracket with ease, and he’s more than
capable of suiciding into a Barkwhip. He
will rarely meet a blocker stronger than
himself. His only real threats are other
evo creatures and fatties. 5000 power is
Abilities: First, he has to evolve from
a Liquid Person. Between Aqua Guard, Aqua
Jolter, and Aqua Hulcus, you have no lack of
good selections to choose from.
ability is the one that wins games. When he
hits the field, all blockers on the field go
back to their owner’s hands. That’s
awesome. It can easily clear the field for
a final rush, or it can simply keep your
opponent with little field control. This
guy was pretty much what caused Diamond
Cutter to die as a good deck type.
that I’ve reviewed these stats, let’s see
how they stack up.
Constructed overview: I love this guy.
I personally think he’s better than Crystal
Lancer since he’s faster, and his ability
essentially makes ALL your creatures
unblockable for a turn. He’s a great race,
with a good power level, and an AWESOME
ability. He’s the only evolution creature
I’ve ever used, for good reason. 4.5/5
He’s THAT good.
Limited overview: He’ll be difficult to
use here even if you pull him. There are
only two (non-evo) liquid people in the set,
and one of them is an * overcosted
* rare. The other is a Common, thank
goodness, but he is himself a blocker. So
be careful. If you can get his evo-line,
run him, and if you can’t, put him in your
binder. He’s great for trades, and great
for Constructed. 1/5 if you don’t
pull and base liquid people, 5/5 if
swing of his blade, the Crystal Paladin
clears the way to victory.
(Top 4 at
2004 GenCon - Indy
Pojo-ers! I could make up an action-packed story
explaining my month-long absense, claiming that I
was abducted by aliens and forced to play Twister
until my insides exploded. Keeping up the fascade,
I'd cap off my emotional account of the ordeal by
saying I was so exhausted from putting my "right
hand on green" one million times that I couldn't
write card reviews for a month. But, the truth is
I've been uber-busy and now have the time to focus
on writing reviews and articles again. /end excuses
Knives' idea for cards to review this week is very
fun. Today we have to review an Evolution creature
that we either love or feel is not playable.
I'm all for loving the Liquid People and Beast Folk
evolutions, but I've discussed all of them more than
what should have been permissible under the law. I
want to review a subpar evolution. So let's review
Never heard of Legendary Bynor? Come on! He's a
Legend, hence the name...well, anyways, here's the
stats for quick reference:
Evolution--Put on one of your Leviathans.
Your other water creatures in the battle zone can't
1. Double breaker. Double Breaker is standard fare
on fatties and most evolution creatures. From a
highly competitive standpoint, a double breaking
fattie nearly requires an additional effect
complimenting this ability, or affordability, or
stellar synergy with other creatures to be worth a
2. Your other water creatures in the battle zone
can't be blocked. Okay, so here's the additional
effect I mentioned that can be a defining asset on a
fattie. When Bynor drops all your other Water
hitters can run beats uncontested, and Bynor's 8000
power can give many blockers and tapped creatures a
run for their mana. Even with Bynor sitting idle in
the face of a wall like Gran Gure, your other Water
guys just have to worry about being slammed on the
rebound or triggering something devastating. Unlike
race-mate King Nautilus, Bynor's effect includes all
other Water creatures (not just Liquid People), he
lacks summoning sickness so he can immediately join
the beatdown, and he's 6 mana so he's not too
expensive. Your other Water guys are unblockable for
as long as Bynor is out, which could be more than
one turn. Sounds good, right?
Well, in general, Evasion is not the powerhouse
ability is was several sets ago. Blocker-heavy decks
just aren't making the rounds. If I'm concerned with
forcing my field through a wall then I'd want a
choice that doesn't push me into a heavy Water
commitment and into running subpar creatures as
evobait. Evasion appears to be a more competitve
asset when it comes cheaper (Paladin, although not
permenant evasion), or extends to the whole of your
field regardless of creature composition (again,
Paladin). Bynor would be an okay fit in mono-Water
decks in terms of maximum payoff for your 6 mana
investment, but it's not nearly supported well
enough to be worth decking over the Liquid People
evos. Bynor has some desirable traits, but the major
factor preventing it from being competitive material
... his race. Legendary Bynor is a Leviathan. There
are 9 Leviathans besides Bynor, and many of them
pack useful effects that run the gamut from tutoring
to drawing to bouncing. However, Leviathans are some
of the most expensive hitters in the game. This is
the race that houses King Tsunami, the 12 mana "OMG
how are you going to get that thing into play"
monstrosity! Another point against the race is that
there is often a cheaper Water creature that can do
the nearly the same job and with more support than
There's only one Leviathan costing below 6 mana---ONE---BELOW
6 MANA---and that's King Coral. I've seen King Coral
decked by very competent players, but it's an
awkward piece of blocker/hitter and that was in a
meta long past. At 3 mana you have a 1000 power
creature that can block, attack creatures, and
attack players. But, you're paying an additional 2
mana to have a Marrow Ooze without a suicide effect.
If overpaying for 'aggro'
evobait blockers was a highly desirable setup then
Aqua Shooter would have been commonplace in Lancer
decks long ago.
After King Coral at the 3cc, the situation becomes
even worst for Bynor's employment chances on the
field. The next evobait choice appears at 6 mana and
again there's only one, King Neptas. Neptas costs
the same amount of mana as Bynor, not exactly the
hallmark of curve management. Leviathans are tricky
creatures to play and basically require decks with
mana acceleration to reap benefits from them. That
brings me back to maximum payoffs. If some of the
creatures in my field are going to be Nature
hitters, then why not have a means to make them
unblockable so I can mount an even more threatening
offense versus an opponent who has spent turns
playing defensively? Oh wait, there is a
way...Paladin. You could make a small commitment to
Bynor and run 4 King Coral and 2 Bynor, but how
about running a finisher that has more ways to
surface.. like Lancer? The important factor in
evaluating an Evolution creature's playability is
its base creature pool.
Having a cheaper and more fleshed out evo line might
help rescue Bynor from the realm of obscurity.
Bynor rocks the same cost-to-power package as
Crystal Lancer, 8000 power for
6 mana. Bynor can kill a wide range of creatures,
and overrun the great
majority of blockers that see play in the current
meta. That's a sweet
package for sure, but it means diddly squat since
Bynor's base creature
selection pool is as sexy as a rabid baboon in
Constructed: 1.5/5. Bynor would be more playable if
his evoline were more
playable and the Liquid People weren't so tasty.
Sure, you can get him out
faster running Nature, but that undercuts the
maximum benefit of his evasion
ability. Sure, you could play him in mono-Water, but
try keeping an
overcosted weenie like King Coral out for 3 turns.
Limited: 0/5. One Word: NOOOOO! No support. Bad
support. Evolutions on the
whole are less playable in Limited, and Bynor clocks
in as one of the worst
Limited choices ever, Draft or Sealed.
Day Two of
“You Choose It” week. Today we are reviewing any
Evolution creature, good or bad. I’ve chosen
Überdragon Jabaha. He falls into the bad category.
Überdragon Jabaha-Fire Civilization, Armored Dragon
race, 7 mana, 11000 attack, and “Evolution-Put on
one of your Armored Dragons. Each of your other fire
creatures in the battle zone has "power attacker
+2000." (While attacking, a creature that has "power
attacker +2000" gets +2000 power.) Double Breaker.”
Where do I begin…this card is one of the worst
evolution cards to ever be released; quite possibly
the worst. First of all, lets look at the cards he
evolves from. Bolshack (popular among newer players,
however has his uses), Bolzard (unfortunately used
by newer players as well, uses are far more limited
however), Boltail (generic creature with very little
going for him), Astrocomet (no…don’t even think
about it), Garkago (the best armored dragon so far),
Galklife (way too much light hate oriented), Bolgash
(triple breaker, could be fun to try) and finally
Billion-Degree Dragon (if you Evo him into Jabaha…you
should be shot).
Well, looking over those cards they are pretty cool
looking cards, some whose effects can be utilized.
But then you see their costs…with the lowest ones
costing 6 and the highest costing 10, you realize,
maybe jabaha’s not worth the trouble…and you are
probably right. I guess if you wanted to you could
build a mana building deck that utilizes Elf-X and
Bronze-Arm Tribe to try to get them out early, but
even then it would be a shame to see all that mana
wasted because of a Terror Pit or Natural Snare, and
if you don’t have the Evo, a Death Smoke.
In short, don’t play Jabaha, unless it is for fun.
You will regret the decision immediately.
Constructed- 2/5- It is able to be played, just not
Limited- 0/5- Never use this card in limited, never
Today, we get to review an evolution
card, either your favorite, or one that you think is
the most useless.
Now, I can’t pick my favorite. You
all know it’s Valdios and I’m pretty sure everyone
doesn’t want me to ramble on about that again. You
all would probably rather eat dog biscuits and watch
Dr. Phil…I’ll be back…
So, this means that I have to choose
the most useless evolution. But that won’t be too
great since it’d just be a bunch of people rambling
on about Armored Cannon Balbaro. So I went to the
next one, Astral Warper, but that was already done.
So this continued for a while until I came to this
Mana Cost: 5
Ability: Double Breaker
Gets +1000 for every other human in
the battle zone when attacking
Meet Armored Groblav, bigger brother
of the more popular Armored Blaster Valdios and the
pwner of Armored Cannon Balbaro. We all should know
this as the first promo that was given in JDC
tourneys and Leagues, so we’re pretty familiar with
him. This was around the same time we all got
introduced to barkwhip, probably the most abused evo
ever, next to Alcadeias. So, what made us like
Groblav so much? Was it because we were all
impatient for Armored Blaster Valdios, or were we
just too caught up in the Barkwhip stuff that we
were to busy to notice?
The Positive Side
Basically, if you know Valdios, you
know him. There is one major different between both,
besides mana cost. Valdios powers others and Groblav
powers itself. So it’s teamwork against
Self-improvement…Sounds like the MLB steroid
It does cost 1 more than Valdios. Is
not really that much of a problem, but it does
affect the card, but I’ll get to that later. The 1
more mana to have a non-fixed power is sometimes
This card doesn’t always die to cards
like Szubs Kin and Angler Cluster, cards that
Valdios would fall to, which gives Groblav somewhat
of an advantage.
5 mana is decently small compared to
other evolutions. It’s mana cost is the standard
cost for a Double Breaker, which is okay.
That’s really all I have to say about
the positive. It’s good side is really not that much
different from Valdios. The Negatives differ
The Negative Side
Hurray!! Now I can start bashing on
this Valdios Wantabe!!
The mana cost is the major factor in
making Valdios a better card. 4 isn’t affected by
any card. To my knowledge, 4 bypasses many strong
staples for a couple of turns. 5, however, can hit
trouble next turn when your opponent has a potential
6 mana. So Valdios has a potential 1 extra turn to
live and Double Break and crap.
Groblav’s ability only lasts for it’s
attack. It goes back to 6000 as soon as it’s tapped.
So it can get hit by the monsters that kill Valdios.
Still no advantage there.
Groblav does not really do much as a
team player, what ever that really means. Valdios
helps others outlive their eventual death, even
though most people neglect that ability. Groblav
does get some power out of the other humans, but is
it that really worth it to chose this guy over
Valdios? No…it really isn’t…trust me…ok, so you
don’t trust me. Go find out for yourself then.
Finally, here’s what else can you
-Uh…how about Valdios?!!!
- you can even go a human and an
Armored Cannon Balbaro
- DFBC then Rothus?
There really aren’t many other things
to play instead of this besides Valdios.
The Limited Side
It’s not that much better here.
Valdios is amazing in limited because it’s cheap.
This guy is also pretty cheap, but there are
bet….wait….how can you get this in limited if it’s a
promo?...It’s not in a pack….Why the hell am I doing
this section then?...That’s it…I quit…*slams
Here’s the + and – again
+ Poor Man’s Valdios
+ Does basically the same thing as
+ Powers itself up
+ Double Breaker
- 1 more mana makes it infinitely
worse than Valdios
- Doesn’t stay powered when tapped
- Doesn’t power other humans like
Not that bad if you don’t have
Valdios, it’s just masked by Valdios’ overall zeal
and popularity. It’s just that the mana cost makes
it vulnerable to those pesky staples. It is better
in some ways though, if you need power
Not bad in limited. Still fast and strong. You’ll
have a harder time drafting this thing than using
it. If you find this in a pack, I’ll give you a
As if Valdios needs more traits on this guy. It’s
like watching Michael Jordan and the Chicago Bulls
take on 10-year olds…I’d like to see that actually…
Well, that’s it for Armored Groblav.
If anyone has any Questions, comments, concerns, or
complaints, E-mail me at