WAZZAAAAAABI! Hello Pojo and
friends. The children at the Pokemon League got another beating.
It was on Saturday, May 27, at the Chesterfield, MO Toys R' Us. There
was 28 people there. I bet you thought I was going to use a Fire-type
deck, huh? Well I was...until I realized I had no more Fossil Magmar of
Double Colorless Energy. No one would trade them to me, not even
for a Mr. Mime or a Dark Dragonite! So I stuck to my good
old Wigglin' Beatstick, The Wigglin' Wonders of the World!
3 Bills
3 Professor Oak
3 Computer Search
3 SER
3 Rocket Sneak Attack
2 Item Finder
2 Challenge!
3 Plus Power
2 Gust of Wind
24 Trainers
6 Fire Energy
9 Psychic Energy
4 Double Colorless
19 Energy
The strategy, if you have been
living under a rock, is to GET WIGGLY FAST! and then blow stuff up with him.
I got lots of e-mail asking how come I don't have any Energy Retrievals and
not much Energy. The answer: Promo Mewtwo, DUH. When I have to
discard energy, I discard Psychic Energy so my Mewtwos can do their job and
soak it back up. Anyway, on to the slaughtering...
Round 1: Girl wants to
Fight!
This girl is a
snotty little cheater who thinks she knows everything. She is a regular,
and every time I play her, I win. (Who uses Bellsprout with no
Weepinbell??) Her and her little friends were there, and she always asks
what deck I use (Man I hate that) Anyway, this time she was using a Lightning
deck. It had Lt. Surge's Electabuzz in it, and it was the only card with
a cover on it, so she shuffled her deck so that it was on the top. I
don't care anyway because I have a killer hand of Jiggly, Wiggly, Scyther,
Mewtwo, Magmar, an Oak and a Fire Energy. I start with Magmar to her
Surge's Electabuzz. I go first, draw a Double Colorless, drop the Fire
Energy on Magmar and use Smokescreen. Her turn. He goes and drops
a Lightning Energy on her Buzz and tries to use Electric Discharge (Flip a
coin for the amount of Lightning Energy cards attached to Lt. Surge's
Electaubzz. This attack does 30x the number of heads) She flips
Tails and it fails. I go and drop the Double Colorless on Jiggly, Evolve
to Wiggly and Oak. I Rocket Sneak Attack. Her hand is Pokedex,
some Lightning Energy, and a Potion. I start laughing and she gets mad.
I sneak away the Potion, laugh some more, and Smoke her again. She goes
and attaches another Energy on Buzz and uses that lame ol' Pokedex. Then
she uses Electric Discharge. She flips heads. Then she says,
"Well there are 2 Energy on him. This attack does 60." I
tell her she is wrong and you have to flip coins, but she doesn't believe me.
I call Gym Leader Mason over, and he says I am right. She flips two
tails. I go, retreat Magmar, drop an Energy on Wiggly, lay down a
Mewtwo, send out Wiggly and Wave the Electabuzz away. She says,
"You have to flip a coin for each Benched Pokemon and it does 10x the
number of heads." I show her Wiggly and then she yells at me.
She sends out Magnemite and uses Thunder Wave. It doesn't Paralyze me.
I go on to beat the rest of her Pikachu, Magnemite and Voltorb.
WIN 1-0
Round 2: Bo wants to Fight!
I always fight
Bo, and I always win. He always uses a Dark Charizard deck. I
start with a Jiggly vs Fossil Magmar. He goes first and Smokes me.
I go and Bill a few times, Oak once, then Challenge! him. He
declines. Then he mentions how a stall deck could beat me so easily
since I burn through my deck like a speed demon. I drop down a Double
Colorless and a Plus Power and try to Pound for 30. I flip Heads and it
works! He goes and lays a Rocket Charmander down. He lays an
Energy on him and Smokes me. I go again, draw a Promo Mewtwo. I
Rocket Sneak away a Super Energy Removal. I attach another Plus Power to
Jiggly. I Computer Search for an Oak and drop 2 Psychic Energy.
Then I Oak and get Wiggly, some Trainers, and 1 Scyther. I Challenge
again, and since he senses danger he accepts. I then Wave away Magmar.
(Don't apply Smokescreen since I evolved) He sends out a Chansey. He
attachs an Energy to Charmander and evolves to Dark Charmeleon. Then he
passes. I need a Super Energy Removal, but I don't have one! I lay
an Energy on the benched Mewtwo. Then I wave. He goes and Scoops
Up Chansey. Then he sends out Charmeleon. He attaches a Fire to
him, and Evolves to Dark Charizard. He flips 2 heads and Wiggly gets
burnt to a Wigglin' Crisp. I send out Mewtwo. I lay an Energy on
him and Psyburn for 40. He lays another Energy on Dark Charizard and
flipes a Heads and a Tails. Whoo! I start loading a Scyther on my
bench. All his bench is Chansey so Mewtwo won't help much. I go on
and KO his Charizard. He comes out with Chansey, attaches a Fire Energy
and does nothing. I retreat Mewtwo, drop a Jiggly on the bench, and
attach a DCE to Scyther. Then I slash. He attachs another Fire
Energy and Scrunches. It fails. I lay a Wiggly on top of Jiggly,
drop an Energy on him, and SER his Chansey, discarding one from my benched
Mewtwo. Then I Slash again. He goes and Potions (What is with
these Potions? Doesn't anyone ever realize how much they suck?)
Then attaches a DCE on to a benched Chansey and passes. I drop a DCE on
Wiggly, retreat Scyther and Wave. He attaches another DCE on benched
Chansey and passes. I wave KO his Chansey. Out comes the other
one. He Double-Edges me and KO Wiggly. Out comes Scyther again.
I Slash him with a Plus Power and KO. He sends out his last Chansey.
He attaches a DCE and Scrunches. It works. I attach an Energy to a
Magmar and pass. He attaches a DCE and KO Scyther with Double-Edge.
I send out Magmar, attach a Fire Energy. Then I Computer Search for Item
Finder, and Item Find a Plus Power. I attach it. Then, I Oak for
my other Item Finder, and Item Find another Plus Power. I attach it to
Magmar as well. Then I Smog him for 40 and since he Double-Edged my
Scyther, Chansey is KO'd! We were both down to our last few prizes too!
That was the closest match I've had with him. Too bad 2 of my SER
were at the bottom of my deck!
WIN 2-0
Round 3 & 4: Fat Boy wants to
Fight!
This kid
actually did use a Tentacool-Damage Swap Deck. We decide to play best
2-out-of-3.
Game 1: He says how dead I
am and all that other BS. I start with a Scyther vs a Dratini.
I attach an Energy, Rocket Sneak away a Nightly Garbage Run, Bill twice,
and then I Challenge! him. It took him a while since he didn't know what
Rocket Sneak and Challenge! was. Then he accepted. He didn't seem
to read it right, and didn't even load his Bench. I dropped a bunch of
Jiggly and Magmar down. I pass. He draws and bursts out laughing.
Then he lays an Abra and a Tentacool on his bench. "You are so
totally dead! I can't possibly lose!" He exclaims.
"There is always a chance you can lose. Don't be overconfident,
because you might make a mistake you normally don't," I tell him.
He shrugs it off and laughs some more. Then he lays an energy on
Dratini and Pounds for 10. I go, Gust of Wind out the Tentacool,
drop a DCE and Slash the Tentacool dead. He sends out a Mr. Mime
from his hand. I say he can't do that and has to send out someone first.
He doesn't believe me until I ask for the Gym Leader. The Gym Leader
says I am right, so the boy sends out Dratini. He Pounds again. I
attach an Energy to Jiggly on the Bench, and Oak. I Rocket Sneak away
another Nightly Garbage Run. Then I Item Find the Rocket Sneak and Sneak
away a Potion, just to spite him. (I wanted to bash his head through the wall
at this point, because I hate Potion so terribly much) I Slash with a Plus
Power and kill Dratini. He sends out Mime and attaches an energy to him.
Then he drops down a Tentacool on his bench. He laughs and says that
Scyther can't touch him. I go and retreat Scyther for Jiggly. I
drop a DCE on Jiggly, CPU Search for a Wiggly. I don't evolve just yet.
I Pound. He goes and Breeders an Abra on the Bench into Alakazam and
swaps it to Tentacool, then Cowardice. He puts Tentacool back down.
He attaches an energy to Mr. Mime and Meditates, but it does 0 because of
Resistance. I go and Gust in Alakazam, drop a DCE on the Jiggly on my
bench, and Item Find a Plus Power. I CPU Search for another one, evolve
to Wiggly, and *BOOM* 80 Damage Do The Wave! Alakazam hits the Discard
Pile. He sends out Mime and laughs. I laugh back at him, retreat for
Jiggly and Pound. He does nothing and I pound and win.
WIN 3-0
Game 2: Again he says I will
lose and how I got lucky last game. He draws his 7, and has a
basic, but he says he doesn't like his hand and shuffles it back in. I
tell him that's cheating, and the Gym Leader agrees with me again. He
says there's nothing I can do about it, so I just draw 2 extra cards. I
start with a Magmar vs his Mr. Mime. I go and Smoke him. He lays
an Energy on the Mime, Potions, and passes. I attach an energy to
Magmar, Rocket Sneak another Potion (!!) and Smog with heads. He says it
does nothing because of Invisible Wall, but I say that my attack didn't do 30
damage, my attack did 20 and the poison did 10. I call over the Gym
Leader and he agrees with me. He attachs an Energy and Meditates, but is
knocked out that turn because of Poison. He had no more basics. He
says he gets to draw 1 more time and if he gets a Basic we keep playing.
I say that once he has no more basics the game is over. He says,
"Whatever" and then leaves. He comments on how he has a
Clefable deck that would beat any Moltres deck because Clefable could
Metrnenome a Wildfire attack and discard 60. I say that 1. Clefairy/Clefable
suck (IMHO! IMHO! NO HATE MAIL!) 2. Moltres decks aren't very common. 3.
Clefairy/Clefable cannot use Wildfire because
even though Clefable does not have to pay additional costs, such as discarding
energy, Moltres's Wildfire attack only costs 1 fire energy, and by itself has
no effect. It does have an additional attack clause, that says if you
wish, you may discard any number of Fire Energy. If you choose to do so,
then your opponent discards that many cards from the top of their deck.
This is not a required cost, as it does not HAVE to be paid - you CAN Wildfire
for 0. That is why it does not work that way. Again he doesn't
believe me. He walks away and challenges some other kid.
WIN 4-0
I walk around a
while looking for kids with DCE and Fossil Magmar. I get responses like,
"I don't have any." "It's in my deck." or "Sure.
I'll trade it for your Charizard/1st Edition Dark Raichu!" I give
up and decide to buy some boosters. I check my wallet...and it's empty!
I forgot my Mom didn't pay me my weekly allowence yet, so I'm broke. I
sit down and pull some quarters from my pocket and buy a Dr. Pepper. The
girl from Round 1 is teaching her Newbie Friend how to play and she is
using a Kadabra. Her friend is using Chansey. I overhear:
"OK, I use Super Psy and it does 50 to your Chansey." I cut
in, "You forgot about resistance. Chansey has a resistance to
Psychic, and so Super Psy does 20." The girl rolls her eyes,
"My friend is a beginner and she doesn't need to know about Resistance
yet." Her friend says, "But I would be winning if I knew about
this Resistance thing! My Lickitung wouldn't be knocked out!"
The girl then tells me to go away and mind my own business. I tell the
girl if she is going to teach her friend the game, do it right, and walk off.
I see an unsuspecting kid and challenge him. It turns out he goes to my
school!
Game 5: Ryan wants to Fight!
Ryan is
using a Fire- Water- deck with Charizard and Dark Blastoise. (Why don't
these people ever learn Fire- and Water- are not good together...especially
with 2 Stage 2s!!) Anyway, I start with 2 Fossil Magmars and a Mewtwo.
I start with Magmar active. He starts with Base Squirtle, Rocket one on
bench, and Rocket Charmander on the bench. I Gust of Wind the Rocket
Squirtle and Smoke him. He attaches to Rocket 'Mander. I go,
Rocket Sneak a Gust of Wind, Comp. Search for Jiggly, drop him on my bench,
drop an Energy on him, and Smoke again. He goes, attaches an energy on
Rocket Squirtle and Breeders him. I attach an Energy to Magmar and Smog
with Heads and KO his active Squirtle. He sends out his Blastoise with 2
Energy on it. He lays another one on it and Hydro Cannon to KO my
Magmar. I send out Jiggly, Evolve to Wiggly, Rocket Sneak away a Super
ER, Drop a DCE, SER his Blastoise, Oak and Challenge! to load my bench.
It turns out he has no more basics in his deck! Then I Gust in the Charmander
and Kill it. My prize was...Plus Power! YES! He sends out that
Blastoise attaches a DCE and Rocket Tackle me. I guess the Plus Power
isn't needed now. He flips tails. I Do The Wave and KO his
Blastoise for the win.
WIN 5-0
Game 6: Matt wants to Fight!
Matt is
my friend who comes with me to the League a lot. Matt uses a Stall deck
with Promo Mewtwo, Chansey, and Dark Slowbro (Don't ask me) I start with
Scyther vs Chansey with Abra, Chansey and Mewtwo on the bench. I have
Jiggly and Magmar on the bench. I attach an energy to Scyther and pass.
He lays an energy on Mewtwo and passes. I lay a DCE and a Plus Power on
Scyther. I CPU Search for Oak, because I need Wiggly. I Oak and
get lots of toys like Mewtwo, Wiggly, Rocket Sneak etc. I Rocket Sneak
away a Pokemon Center. I Slash for 40. Then he attaches another
energy to his Promo Mewtwo. He Gusts in my Mewtwo. I draw, SER his
Promo Mewtwo and Gust it in. Then I absorb. He goes, attaches an
Energy to Chansey. I KO Mewtwo. He sends out Chansey. He
attaches another energy and Scrunch. It fails. I attach an Energy
to Jiggly, Item Find the Gust of Wind and bring in Abra from his
bench. Psyburn KO. He sends out Chansey, attaches an
Energy and Scrunch...it works. I go, SER his Chansey, retreat
Mewtwo. and bring in Tuff. Then I drop a DCE on it. I
lullaby. He keeps sleeping. He attaches an Energy on to the
2nd Abra on his Bench, evolves to Dark Kadabra, and then uses Matter Exchange. He
ends turn and Chansey wakes up. I attach an Energy to Magmar on the
bench, Gust in a Slowpoke on his bench and KO it. Matt growls
and brings in his Chansey again. He shows me that he had Dark
Slowbro. He draws, then uses Matter Exchange. He drops a Slowpoke
on his bench. By now I have 3 Bills and a Challenge in my hand.
I have Oaked twice and was running low on cards. He attaches a DCE
on Chansey. I go and Wave him. He attaches another DCE and Kills
us both. I send in Magmar, he sends in Slowpoke. I attach another
energy and Smog without Poison. He attaches the 2nd Energy to Slowpoke
and uses Fickle Attack and it works. I figure I had to do what I
had to do. I used my Bills. I Item Find for Plus Power, and I
Smog. If heads, Slowbro dies, and I had one last Dark Kadabra to worry
about. It was...HEADS! He sends in Dark Kadabra and Mind Shock for
30 and KO Magmar. I send in Scyther and Slash. He uses Mind Shock.
I Slash and win.
WIN 6-0
Game 7: Redneck wants to
Fight!
If you've
read prior Deck Reports, you all ready know how incredibly gay this kid is.
The amazing thing is,he always wears the same thing every week at the Pokemon
League! Dirty white shirt, blue pants, and velcro shoes. He is
using a really messed up Raindance deck that has 4 Squirtle, 1 Wartortle, 1
Breeder, and 1 Blastoise. It also had Eevee and Vaporeon instead of
Seel/Dewgong. It has way too many evolutions like Poliwrath line
and it only has 1 Articuno and 1 Lapras. He doesn't have any good
trainers either, but he has like 30 Energy. I start with Scyther vs a
Poliwag. I go first and attach an energy and pass. He draws and
lays an energy on the Squirtle on his bench. I attach DCE and KO
Poliwag. Here comes the Squirtle Squad. He bubbles and doesn't
paralyze me. I draw a Mewtwo. I CPU Search for a Plus Power,
retreat for Mewtwo, and absorb the energy back. He goes and attaches a
DCE and evolves to Wartortle. Then he bites me. I draw an Oak.
I see my chance to win this turn. I lay the Plus Power, and Oak. I
then CPU and see that both my Plus Power are in my deck! I get one out,
then Oak 2 more times. Finally after ripping through my deck, I have 3
Plus Power on Mewtwo and I Psyburn to KO his Wartortle. Apparently,
Redneck has realized I have beaten him every time I've played him, says
nothing, and leaves the Toys R' Us with tears in his eyes. Considering how
incredibly gay he is, and how extremely rude he's been to me, I
don't feel sorry for him at all.
WIN 7-0
Game 8: Matt 2 wants to
Fight!
This isn't my
friend Matt, it's some OTHER Matt, who also uses a Stall deck. Weird,
huh? In my last Deck Report, he was The Dork, but I guess I was being
kind of mean when I called him that. He IS a dork, but he's still a nice
guy. Anyway, I start with Mewtwo vs a Jynx. He goes first and
attaches an energy and Double Slaps me for 0. I go, CPU Search for a
Jiggly (Wiggly in hand) and absorb energy back. He attaches an Energy to
a benched Jynx and Double Slaps me for 20. I attach an Energy to Jiggly,
evolve. and then I Psyburn to KO him. He goes and lays a Snorlax on his
bench. Then he attaches a DCE to him. He Double Slaps for 40.
I Oak and get a Scyther, a Magmar, a Jiggly, a Bill, a Plus Power, a
Challenge! and a DCE. I drop the Basics and Bill to get Bill and Mewtwo.
I Bill again and get SER and Gust of Wind. I drop the DCE on Wiggly, and
after I SER his Snorlax, I Psyburn to KO his Jynx. Out comes an
Energy-less Snorlax. He lays an energy and passes. I retreat
Mewtwo, send out Wiggly, drop an Energy on him. I Rocket Sneak away a
Pokemon Center. Then I Wave. He Potions. I Wave
again and I win.
WIN 8-0
Game 9: AeroMew wants to
Fight!
This kid
is using an AeroMew deck, so I would have to go without Wiggly,
or get him really fast. He goes first with a Promo Mewtwo and a Mew
on the bench. I have Scyther out, with a Promo Mewtwo and a
Jiggly on the bench. He attaches an Energy and passes. I
guess he's going to power Mewtwo the old-fashioned way. In that
case, I retreat Scyther and send out my Mewtwo. I CPU Search
for a Gust of Wind, dropping 2 Energy, and absorb it back up. He
goes and attaches another energy to Mewtwo. I Psyburn KO. He
sends out Mew and drops a Mysterious Fossil on the bench. He uses
Psywave and a Plus Power to KO Mewtwo. I send out Jiggly. I lay an
energy on my Scyther because I know Aerodactyl is coming soon. He
lays an Energy on the Mysterious Fossil and passes. I lay a DCE on
Scyther and SER the Fossil. Then I Sneak away a Scoop Up. I
pass. He goes, lays an Energy on Fossil and evolves. I lay an
Energy on Scyther and wait him out. He retreats Mew, and kills
Jiggly iwth 'Dactyl. I send in Scyther and KO Aero. He sends
in Mew. Psywave for 30. I Slash with a Plus Power to end it.
WIN 9-0
Game 10: AeroMew wants to Fight!
(Again)
He is sure I
would lose this game. I figure, what the heck, I still have 30
minutes left. He starts with a Mew to my Jigglypuff. I
go first and lay a DCE and Pound. He goes and lays Aerodactyl on his
bench. I say he has to evolve from Fossil. He says whatever. He
passes and I Pound with a Plus Power to win again.
WIN 10-0
Game 11: Really, Really Tall Kid
wants to Fight!
I played him
last week and he uses a Psychic-Water deck. He starts with a Rocket
Golduck and I have Magmar and Mewtwo on the bench. I go first, Rocket
Sneak an Oak, attach a Plus Power and Smoke for 20. He goes and tries to
use the Dizziness attack but it fails. I attach an energy, Smog with
Heads. 2nd turn KO.
WIN 11-0
Well that was it for the day.
I looked around for more kids who would trade me and I found none. I
played in the Pokemon Stadium tournament that was going on during the
League and won with my own GB top team. I got another Promo Arcanine and
another Holo Mew. I also got my 4th Pre-release Dark Gyarados...the last
one! I got a Mew Marble, a Computer Error, and a kid traded me
Venusaur and Blastoise for my Holo Dark Alakazam (I have 2) so now I have
finally finished my Base Set. I'm also just 20 points away from the
Thunder Badge While I was waiting for my ride, I found an opened
booster in the parking lot. It had a Super ER in it.
Apperantly someone was wanting a Charizard and got a trainer instead, so they
just left it. I took it...I might be able to use it somewhere!
Anyway, that was it. Another undefeated day at Pokemon League. The
Iron Fist still rules Toys R' Us. The Wigglin' Wonder of the World did
its job, and I am still king. By the way, I'm sure I'll have my
Fire-deck ready next week! All Right, Pojo-Holics. Until Next
Time, here's PROPZ and SLOPZ
Props:
To Toys R' Us for having both the
League and the Stadium Tourney.
To Mason the Gym Leader for being
cool and helping me prove idiots wrong.
To almost all of my opponents for
being good losers.
To The Wigglin' Wonders of the
World for being the best deck I've ever built.
To Wigglytuff. You are the
coolest Beatstick in the shade of Pink!
To my new Fire deck, you're gonna'
rock.
To Bo for being the only real
challenge.
To the kids who traded me the
cards I needed to complete the Base set.
Slops:
To the kids who wouldn't trade me
the cards I need.
To Fat Boy, Girl, and AeroMew for
cheating.
To Redneck for being a Redneck and
for whining like a little baby and crying and for being stupid and can't tie
your shoes and for using a lame Raindance (Raindances aren't lame, but his is)
and being gay and wearing knee-socks and for infesting the world with your
stupidity. OK now that I've got that off my chest...
To Potion. OK kids, let me
tell you why Potion is possibly the worst trainer in the game. Take my
Beatstick for example. Say I have a Wiggly vs a Lickitung. I Do
The Wave for 60. Then the Lickitung guy Potions, and now there is
40 damage on him. Then I Wave again and I kill the Lickitung anyway!
See, it doesn't make a difference and it's just dead space. If the
Potion did help the Pokemon last a turn, like against a Chansey, I have Plus
Powers to finish you off. SO DON'T PUT POTION IN ANY OF YOUR
DECKS...EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER! NO POTION! Potion is bad. Just
keep repeating that to yourself.