"Crisis Weapon X"
                                By Robbie Crosby (a.k.a Cyber Blastoise)
                                Intergalatic Traders
                                Houston, Texas
                                Saturday, September 9th, 2000

<editor's note #1: Robbie is lucky I know that Intergalactic traders is in Houston (or at least the Houston area, so I was able to fill in that part of the REQUIRED header.  Everyone, remember - if you are not running a header very similar to this, then we will not publish your report!  Thanks!  -Scott>

<editor's note #2: I sure am going to feel stupid if Intergalactic traders is not in Houston.  -Scott>
                   
3 Promo Mewtwo
3 Electabuzz
2 Scyther
2 Ditto
4 ER
3 SER
3 GOW
2 CPU Search
3 Nightly Garabage Run
3 Oak
3 Bill
3 Scoop Up
3 SER
3 Pluspower
2 Switch
9 Psychic Energy
6 Electric
4 DCE
2 Full heal energy

        This tournament almost went terribly for me. Right off the bat, I
notice at least FIVE people are playing Wiggly. Not a good thing for my Promo
Mewtwo at all.
    However, I found out that those decks had INSANELY low energy counts
(12-15!)   and used Hitmonchan a lot. I resisted letting loose a maniacal
laugh.

    One look at this deck will tell you that this is a Sponge Variant, except
I don't rely on Mewtwo except as cleanup crew. This is also my first deck
with good card drawing.

Round 1 Vs. Matt with Wiggly deck.

This was hilarious. At the begining of the round, he notices three promo
Mewtwo and a Ditto as my starters against his Active Hitmonchan and three
Jigglypuff. I then ask him, "Can your deck function with 10 less energy?" He
laughs nevously, but smilies. Too bad. I had a hand consisting of Three Psy
and a CPU Search as my first draw card (I won the flip). I attach Psy to
Mewtwo, CPU Search for Oak.

He starts to sweat.

I do energy absorbtion, and marvel at my hand of three ER, two Pluspower,
full heal energy and a SER.

He attaches a DCE to Jiggly, probably thinking that he can use Hitmonchan as
a one-turn stall while waiting to evolve Wiggly.

No such luck, pal.

I ER the DCE (@#$%!), attach a DCE to Ditto, and Psyburn, knocking out
Hitmonchan.

He sends out Jigglypuff and Challenges me. Nope. Challenges me again, nope.
He is now looking rather p.o'ed. He attaches Fighting energy, and lullabies.

I wake up, put down my Electabuzz I just drew, attach a lightning energy, and
then Psyburn.

He laughs, then realizes that he has no bench to work with, and that one good
solid thunderpunch + pluspower means he loses.

He evolves to Wiggly and lullabyes.

I admit it, I was scared. I flipped tails for sleep, and I had no healing
trainers. If he drew Oak, it was curtains for me.

I draw my card, and to my delight, it's Bill. I draw two cards, Pluspower and
CPU Search.

I put down two psychic energies for CPU Search, get Switch, and bring out
Electabuzz. Though he hasn't collected any prizes, I STILL want this over
with as quickly as possible. I attach all my pluspowers, and he says that if
I flip tails, it will deal 60 to him and 40 to Electabuzz. I inform him that
the card states increased damage to the defending pokemon.
I flip for ThunderPunch...

Heads, and Wiggly is electrocuted.

1-0

Round Two Versus Raindance

I'll try not to laugh as I tell the tale of First-turn win. He sends out
Squirtle as his Active and only pokemon, saying, Oh, you are SOOOO dead.  He
flinches as I reveal my active, an Electabuzz. I have a hand of 2 Psy energy,
1 Electric, Ditto, Electric energy, Pluspower, and CPU search. I win the coin
flip, and give the poor sap a grin that looks like this demented freak of
nature:

[Unable to display image]

      He starts to sweat, propably because he thinks I'm insane. I put down
an electric energy, attach a pluspower, CPU search for another pluspower, and
instant turtle soup as I thundershock.

2-0

Round Three Versus this Pro-Boxer type Adult with a Rather odd Sponge.

Promo Mewtwo Versus his Hitmonchan, and he goes first with nuttin' but a jab.
I do CPU search, Discarding a psychic and electric energy, attach a psychic
energy, energy removal, and energy absorbtion.
" I wasn't expecting to have to do THIS" he says, reaching for his pocket.
"OHMIGOD HE'S GOT A GUN!" I think, but he pulls out a coin, and uses Gambler.
Tails, and he mutters, "Dang" unde his breath, and passes. Psyburn for an
easy win. I offer to fix his deck, and he accepts,saying, "Do what ya can. It
hasn't won a match all day." He has good Pokemon, 4 MP Mewtwo and Hitmonchan,
along with Scyther, but his trainers are rather, errr... not good. I won't go
into details. After I politely put it in soft-hearted terms ( I was in no
mood for a black eye.) that the trainers he had belong in a toilet, not a
deck, he starts rummaging through his card binder for the perscribed cards.
He then asks why I'm pale. I say that I was nervous, because It's my first
time, (Big lie) and this is the first deck I've made (Even bigger lie.).
PHEW...
3-0

4th round versus No energy stall.

Of all the times to forget my Goop Gas Attacks...
I see the Chansey and Abra on turn one, and realize the girl is going for an
all out stall. I use CPU search to get a DCE so that my active, Scyther,
could use Slash quicker. On turn two, I've k.o'ed Abra, and she
start sweating. From there on out, I did not use any Oak or Bill, and
purposesly retreated Scyther with Electabuzz and Mewtwo so that I could get
energy in the discard pile for Nightly Garbage Run. Ironically, I DECKED her.
4-0

Finals VS. Evil Bob and his Evil Deck.
This guy was on every one's nerves, insulting the inteligence of every one
there. He had a habit of having his friend "accidentally" bump into his
opponents and spill some beverage on them to distract them. I ask the biggest
guys there, including my previous opponent that made Mike Tyson look like
Togepi, get on either side of me so no "accidents" would occur. He realizes
that his main technique has been axed. He then tries, at every move, and I
mean EVERY move, to accuse me of cheating.  He even said I cheated when I
drew my card, an Oak, saying I had fixed my deck. His Dark Golbat put up a
fight, but Mewtwo mowed him down. He muttered several cuss words. I gust out
his Golbat for the kill, and he growls, bu complies. He then attaches 2
defender to Another Dark Golbat, and smiles, even though he hasn't energy to
attack with, and It's my last prize. He has a good reason. He is at his last
prize (legally, suprisingly.), and Mewtwo has 50 damage. I have no bench to
work with. Nada. Zero. I do have enough energy for Psyburn, though, and
though I'd only deal 40 to his Fresh, no damage Golbat, I look through my
discard pile, (He annouces that I'm cheating, is silenced by said boxer-type
adult.) and realize, that, unless by some unfortunete celestial error, the
card I need is in my last prize, I've only used two Pluspower. I CPU search,
get my last pluspower, and Psyburn. He accuses me, with no attempt to be
quiet, of being a mother-(explative deleted) cheater., and says that he wants
to fight again... without cards. He now gets about 39 different angry glares,
and
I stand up. He is about 5' 0" and bony, I'm nearly six feet and highly
trained in Tae-Kwon-Do. The Boxer-Type adult and a partner of mine in
Tae-Kwon-Do crack their knuckles, and I follow suit. I then give him the
wisest advice he's probably heard all day.

"Run." I growled.

He must of broken the world record for
Fastest-Coward-running-out-of-a-store-because-he-bit-off-more-than-he-can-chew
.

5-0

In the end, the results were thus:

1st Cyber Blastoise/Blade (Me)
2nd Mark with one helluva Wiggly deck.
3rd Joe, previously mentioned Boxer-type adult.
4th Kate, with her incredibly strong NidoQueen's Paradise deck that dealt 100
damage a turn. (No Joke.)
Evil Bob was disqualified. (Gee, wonder why?...)

I got Seven Base 2 Boosters, and recieved some good stuff. Base 2 SEEMS like
a ripoff, but it made my "Glacier Destruction" deck stronger with another
Breeder, and some desperately needed cards, like Bill and SER.

Props and Slops
Props to Shon for hosting the event
Props to Joe and Shon, my two bodyguards during the finals.
Props to Scott Gerhardt (Did I spell that right?) <ed note: You did after I fixed it. :)  -Scott> for inventing the Sponge.
Slops to that lousy idiot we nicknamed "Evil Bob" for being such a jerk.

Email me at RobbieCrosby@aol.com

The insane genius, Cyber Blastoise/Blade, inventor of:
The Lightsaber
Weird Al's Deck
Glacier  Destruction
Psybeam Blowout