Okay, I know all these responses to Dragonfire5's "article" are
getting
pretty old, so if you don't want to read this, then just click the <back>
button on your web browser. If you wish to keep reading, then, well, keep
reading...
Okay, now I've gotten that disclaimer off my hands, I've got
a little
bashing to do, and there's nothing like a slightly disgruntled pokemon to do
so. Well, please don't give him too much trouble, he's still mad at
Wizards
and Pocket Monsters for screwing him over in the card department.
Everyone,
please welcome Magikarp!
<holds up poke ball and Magikarp comes out>
<Magikarp> Magi KARP, KARP!! KARP MAGI KARP KARP!!!
Calm down, Calm down. Lemme turn on the translator.
<Magikarp> Magi Magika <translator starts up> that stupid
sum<bleep>. Was he
dissing Magikarp out there in that 3rd to last sentence? I think he was!
Why I oughtta....
You'll what?
<Magikarp> I'll Fireblast his pathetic excuse for logic back to the
trash
heap it came from!! I can do it, too. I'm not any ordinary Magikarp!!
That you aren't. Well, let's explain WHY his logic is so flawed, where
would
you care to start?
<Magikarp> Well, he's comparing a Basic to a Stage 1, for one thing.
That's
like saying that a Poliwrath is better than a Lapras. The time it takes
(not
to mention the deck space) to GET the Poliwrath doesn't compare with the
superious speed of the Lapras. Anyway, that extra 10 HP ain't gonna last
much longer, considering the fact that that pathetic little Charmander isn't
going to be able to hold up for very long.
Precisely. It's been said before, but I'll say it again. It's no use
comparing pokemon of different stages, because they'll have entirely
different uses. Next point to counter would be the unlikelyhood of doing
60
damage on turn two. He's right, its not that likely! However,
Scyther is
often NOT played in a deck with ANY grass energy. However, a deck with
proper search and drawing capabilities (along several 4 DCE) WILL be able to
get that second-turn 30 damage, right?
<Magikarp> Yup. Wheres the chance of getting a Charmander 1st turn
and
playing an energy on it, getting a DCE AND a Charmeleon is somewhat less
likely. Oooh Oooh, look!! He says that we should just use a
colorless
pokemon!! Can I tell him? Can I?
Sure. Go for it.
<Magikarp> There's only one colorless pokemon with the same power as
Scyther, and that's Farfetched!! But wait, what's Farfetched's weakness?
Lightning? Hmmm...Electabuzz fodder!!! And all the other
"good" colorless
basics require 4 colorless energy to pull of the attack (Kangaskahn, Snorlax,
etc.) and the chances that you'll pull THAT off are SOOOO low....
Hmm..he says that everyone's dissing the Charmander family. Do you want to
take that?
<Magikarp> Who's dissin' the Charmander family, huh? Where are
they, where
are they? I've got a little something for them....
What?
<Magikarp> The "Duh Factor Award for Amazing Intellect."
Charmander is
pretty underpowered, Charmeleon is reasonable, but there are SOOO many Stage
1 fire types out there that surpass "lizard breath," like Arcanine,
Ninetails, and Flareon (Jungle, of course). And then there's Charizard.
Hah
HahHah Hahahahah. Its nice to know I'm not the ONLY one who got
screwed
over when the made the cards...
Yeah, but back to the colorless pokemon theory, there's two OTHER major
problems with that. Fighting is making a real comeback with the
introduction
of Gym 1 and most colorless pokemon are weak to..YES..Fighting pokemon.
The
other problem is that in the future a card called Bellsprout Temple will be
introduced with the Neo Base set. Bellsprout Temple gives all pokemon in
play an automatic resistance to Colorless attacks. So much for that
theory.
<Magikarp> What's left to bash?? Oh here he belittles
Scyther's zero
retreat cost.
You're kidding, right?
<Magikarp> Nope, he says it right there. "[Charmeleon] has a
retreat cost!
Who cares? If someone's good, why do you want to retreat him???"
Foss, you
wanna take this one?
Sure. Say you start with a Charmander. Your opponent starts with a
water
pokemon (say...a Lapras). You realize that your Charmander is in mortal
danger, but you can't find a switch to move him back to the safety of the
bench. You've got to retreat him, but by doing so you end up discarding
your
energy for that turn. Bet you wish you had a Scyther now...
<Magikarp> He then goes on to say that you could evolve Charmeleon
again to
Charizard and knock out some more pokemon. There was SOME logic before
this
(although faulty), but this defies ANY rhyme or reason. In case you don't
understand the reasons to include a pokemon with colorless attacks, its
because it has a particular attack or Poke Power (like Kangaskahn) or because
you're trying to avoid a painful weakness or resistance (in the case that
this makes no sense to you, please refer to Foss's article on color splashing
in the June section of TCG Tips and Strategies). Putting in Charizard no
longer makes the Charmander family an auxillary part of the deck, it makes it
the center of the deck, taking up approximately 9 spaces of your deck given
you've constructed your evolution pyramids correctly.
Precisely.
<Magikarp> Oh, by the way, the chances that you'll get more than one
consecutive Fire Spin (for you morons out there, two or more in a row) is
smaller than a Base Gastly's chance of knocking out more than one pokemon in
a row.
Well, that's about all. Maybe it'll save some gullible young person from
siding with Dragonfire5 and using Charmeleon instead of Scyther.
-Foss, the Magikarp Trainer
and the Fossil Magikarp
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