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Hello! I've decided further clog up the TCG Tips section with my own opinions and complaints. I doubt I'll get much hate mail, because everything I'm going to say has been said over a hundred times by others! So lets begin!

Do you know I hate? I hate Wizards, Hasbro, and Nintendo for being GREEDY!!! Like Energy; they make you put TONS of it in your deck. WHY? I'll tell you why; to make money! They want us to buy cards, and give them money, so they can use it to make more cards, so we can buy them, and the Evil Cycle begins anew!!! ARG! And Base Set 3! Sure, it might not come out, and even if it does, I'll be able to get a mix of the best cards from the included sets, but it's still a rip off!!! And including new types in Neo! I'm sure Wizards and Hasbro, although they do not make the cards, are behind that work of horror! Now I'll have to put more of that wretched energy in my deck, and spend more money!!! They shouldn't even charge money for the cards! That's greedy! Why don't they throw boosters at us on the streets? I'll tell you! Money!

Do you know what else I hate? I hate it when little kids play the game! What business to they have playing!? Sure, the game was designed for them, but it's still unfair! I hate it when their parents watch, too. One time, I beat a kid with my Wiggle Jiggle deck, and his Dad socked me out!!! Another time, I was collecting cards, and had almost finished my Base Set II collection. All I needed was a Pidgey. I found a young child who had one such card. I offered five first edition Base Set Charizard for it, but his Mom told him it was a bad idea, so she bopped me with the binder!!! I was in the hospital for weeks!!! And another thing! Why don't they just learn how to play? Sure, everyone needs to learn how to play before they become masters, but goodness! Instead of trying to help them learn, I usually make fun of them, and throw assorted fruits in their general direction!

Another thing I hate? Archetypes! They ruin the game!!! One might say that their predictability could allow me to build a great counter deck, but I'm too lazy! Why won't Wizards do something about this? I'll tell you; MONEY!!! So here I am, developing carpal tunnel syndrome, complaining about things that everyone generally agrees about!!! That's why I copied my own an archetype, Wiggle Jiggle! I'll show them! But, Wiggle Jiggle is an original deck, because I combined the power of Haymaker with the speed of Tuff Stuff! I might even stick in that Blastoise thing! Some would say that such a thing is combining too many themes, but the most I know about deck building is how to highlight one, Ctrl C, Ctrl V! Soon I'll be playing Wet Wiggle Jiggle!

Yet another thing that I hate is those blasted Props! I'm not smart enough to read about them, and know that they would only apply in DCI tournaments, if they should pass, but I don't care! It's not like a thousand other people haven't written in complaining about something they don't understand! Although everyone complained about Wizards for not doing something about archetypes, now that they have, they're just as bad, maybe worse! Playing with more Pokémon? Never!

Please note: The above is a parody, nothing more. It is a composition of the "strategies" and "tips" that appear on the TCG tips section. Despite this and other disclaimers, I expect angry mail from induhviduals who don't understand the concept of a "parody." If you count yourself in this unfortunate bunch, send mail to xpc39@dnet.net