Solemn Simulacrum – MTG Throwback Thursday (2013)

David
Fanany
Player
since
1995

The Mirrodin Solemn Simulacrum’s oddly photorealistic face is that of Jens Thoren, who won the Magic Invitational back in the early 2000s, when the Invitational was still a thing and at its peak. Almost every Invitational creature generates card advantage in some form, and the Simulacrum does so even more blatantly than some of them do. Depending on how you count his abilities, he’s around three for one and sometimes four, if he blocked a creature with two toughness. This has made him a casual staple, and a competitive one too every time he’s been in Standard. This year will be no different; I hear that a certain spirit dragon is returning to the rotating format too . . .

Constructed: 4/5
Casual: 4/5
Limited: 3/5
Multiplayer: 4/5
Commander: 4/5

A fan favorite since its original appearance in Mirrodin, the creature colloquially known as Sad Robot does a lot of things for four generic mana. You get a proverbial warm body, Rampant Growth, and a cantrip all in one card. None of these will win any awards on their own, but being a completely generic artifact that offers some decks the ability to ramp just a bit further is lovely.

It’s not going to probably dominate standard, but Solemn Simulacrum will likely see a healthy amount of play on its return, as it gives a lot to a deck in a single card. Role compression is lovely, and the Sad Robot does it better than a lot of cards do.

Constructed: 3.75
Casual: 4
Limited: 3.5
Multiplayer: 3.5
Commander: 4.75 (97% of decks can make room for this, and it shines across many different color combinations)