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Twas the Duel Before Christmas
by Jason "Pippin" Reeves


Twas the night before Christmas
And all through the town
The children all waited
For Santa to come down

But ole Chris Cringle
Ole Jolly himself
Was throwing a tantrum
With his disgruntled self.

Up on my rooftop
Is where this fit was
Just happened to be there
And mad he sure was

"I'M TIRED OF CHRISTMAS
THE WHOLE DANG SEASON"
the Jolly old fellow
did yell without reason.

"Why?" I asked
as I clung from a ladder
"Whatever is wrong,
Please, what's the matter?"

 "I'll tell you whats wrong
I'll say what's the matter,
That little brat down the street
Cindy McFatter"

 "She asked to duel me for fun
Or least that what she said,
but after she won,
she demanded my sled."

 "She took all my toys
She stole all my goodies,
She stole Jimmies ball
She took Bobbies booties"

 "I tell you she tricked me
that lying little missy
SHE CHEATED!" he cried
and continued his hissy.

 "How did she cheat?" I asked
To which he replied.
 "You think that I lost?
You think that I lied?!"

He whipped out a Duel Disk
All sparkly with bells
It had Christmas Lights
and it played Jingle Bells

 "DUEL ME NOW!"
He screamed most unpleasant
 "AND WHEN I AM THE WINNER
THAT WILL BE MY PRESENT!"

Never to turn down a duel
I jumped at the task
I pulled out my deck from my jammies
Why it was there, don't ask.

He drew his five cards,
Then proclaimed with a grin
 "You can go first."
And chuckles as we begin.

I drew my 6 cards
and what did I see,
But a Cyber Dragon, Sakuretsu
and Spirit Reaper, WEEE!

I set the Reaper
I set the Saku
and said it was his turn,
He said  "YOU'RE THROUGH!"

He played Heavy Storm
A card most unnerving
but nothing compared
to the card that was coming

It was Cyber Stein
and he used its effect braggin'
 "I pay 5000 LP to summon
Cyber End Dragon!!"

 "Then," he continued
 "I play a spell card
Megamorph you see
this duel was not hard!"

He attack my facedown
and a suprise to his peapers
it was my savior
my own Spirit Reaper.

He chuckled
because of the damage he did
 "7800 Damage to you, hehe"
He looked like a kid.

But I still had 200 LP to work with
and his attack was most tragic
for in his haste to win the duel
he set no Traps and no Magics.

I drew my next card
and much to my zeal
it was the one that could save me
a nice, new Snatch Steal

 "Santa, please
you must know
Christmas is more
than presents and snow

 "It's about caring
and giving and the best in us all
its about celebrating
the best gift of all.

 "It's about mangers
it's about babies in hay
it's stars in the sky
and angels that say

ŒPeace, good will toward men'
It's not about seasons
It's not about dueling
no matter the reason"

 "SHUT IT AND PLAY!"
He snapped most annoyed
He was ready to win
and he was overjoyed.

With him again
I tried to reason
 "I warned you Santa,
about the true reason.

 "Maybe this will help
to jog your head which is hard"
so I played my Cyber Dragonl
and threw down another card.

It was my Snatch Steal
I drew last draw phase
I took his Cyber End Dragon
His face looked amazed.

I smacked his Cyber Stein
and did damage most unpleasant
His LP was dropped
to 0. No more at the present.

 "How did I lose.
How could this be?
I never lose," he cried
 "My dragon's and me"

 "First," I corrected
they really are machines,
And second," I said,
Why were you so mean?"

 "I told you!" He cried
through tears that were sobbing
Cindy McFatter played me
then robbed me."

 "How old is Cindy?"
I asked with a grin
 "She's just barely 9
going on 10"

 "Why did you let her
get away with your sleigh?
Why not just leave,
and call it a day?"

He looked as one struck
he seemed not to think
he stood there a moment
and then he finally winked.

 "I guess I could have,
I don't know why
I just didn't kick her
and then wave goodbye

 "I guess it could be that
I watch too many cartoons
You know the anime's
with wierd rules when you lose."

I just shrugged my shoulders
I just hung my head.
 "Santa please go back
and please get your sled?"

 "HO HO HO!!"
laughed the old farter
and down went the big guy
to Cindy McFatter.

He shouted to all
as he flew out of site
 "Merry Christmas to all
and Happy Dueling all night"