DeathJester

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Time for Some Q & A
by Bryan Camareno a.k.a. DeathJester
September 5, 2006 

 I told you guys I’d be doing some Q & A! I’ve gotten quite a few questions over the last two weeks and I only have the time to answer two this week. REMEMBER: From now on here is the format in which you should send your emails so I will accept your emailed questions for display on this column:

• Full Name:
• UDE Number (if applicable):
• State or Country of residence:
• Question:

Alright, that takes care of business. Enjoy the Q & As!

Q:

From: NOrtiz1170
Sent: Tuesday, August 29, 2006 4:41 AM
Subject: About your team article on Pojo.com

Morning DeathJester86,

   My name is Gadget Hackwrench on Pojo.com forum. I've read your articles, followed your directions and suggestions on how to become a better player and especially your article about teams. I think your article are helpful and puts things into better perspective during times of great stress, tribulations like now as of late. I have a question that is related to your "How to be successful Team" article on Pojo.com a while ago. Have you or known teams to have two members not speaking to each other (one of those members being a leader and the other one non-leader) to the point that one of them joins another team while being on the original team you've set up they've joined with you ?

Here is my situation here is: Myself and a team-mate had a misunderstanding that has lead to neither one of us speaking, being around in the same room for 3 months (almost 4 by next month). My team-mate and I are the best of friends, according to many people who know us both, see us around gaming shops and other places. My team-mate joined another team, while being on the same team with me. Then someone from outside of the team made a nasty, untrue rumor and told my team-mate this. He then says to another team-mate of mine that he is going to stay with the 2nd team that he joined while being on my team.

I've given myself and this person enough space and time to think and let things cool down. What do I do next to try to get the lines of communication going again, to solve the misunderstanding between him and me? After that happens, then how do I ask this person why did they join another time while being on my team? And try to ask them as well to come back to the team?

Any feedback or suggestions would be appreciated.

Thank you for your time, help and great job on the articles there.

Gadget/Natasha Ortiz

Pojo.com handle: Gadget Hackwrench

Spokesperson for "Team Shinigami"

A:

Ah…team drama. Everyone knows I’ve had my fair share of it. I’ve been through betrayal, failure, horrible competitive performance, and team break-ups. I understand where the frustration comes from.

Now, you mentioned that you and your team-mate had a “misunderstanding”. I am not going to inquire as to what that misunderstanding was since it might be personal. However, from a general standpoint it seems that your team-mate doesn’t feel that he/she is viewed as important by you. Joining another team is a way of feeling accepted, especially if one feels rejected by his/her previous team.

The first step would be to stop giving this person space. If it’s been 3 months without words then I think it’s about time to get to the bottom of things and confront that person face-to-face. Your task here is to talk about what pissed off your team-mate so bad that would give him the audacity to join another team while still listed in your roster (which should not be tolerated in the first place). Don’t let him/her run away from it. You have to be a little aggressive in getting this person to talk to you.

Once you get this person to talk to you, ask the questions you’ve wanted to ask. Don’t settle for evasive and stand-offish responses. Get to the bottom of the situation. It may or may not take a couple tries. Don’t let this situation sit around like it did for the last 3 months. Once you given this person the third degree, it’s time to deliver an ultimatum. Here’s what you say:

• “You are either going to stay on my team so we can develop a better relationship or you can stay on the other team & leave things the way they are. If you choose the latter I won’t bother you anymore, just don’t came back to my team until you are ready to resolve this.”

BAM! Slapping your team-mate with a statement like this will be offensive, yes, but you don’t want to B.S. around with this person anymore. Either they give you a straight answer and try to fix things or lose a valuable friend and stay with a lower quality team that can’t offer him/her what you offer. 

Don’t be cold or bitter. Be firm and caring at the same time. Clearly you want to fix the situation and he/she doesn’t. Or it may be the other way around. Bottom line is not being afraid to face the issue and just talking about it.

Q:

From: Seri
Sent: Monday, August 28, 2006 11:16 PM
Subject: In regard to your pojo.com article...

I would like to know what you think about my situation, if you would be so generous as to reply. I'm a 16 year old starting 12th grade, I work basically all a minor can around here(12-15 hours), but I don't have much extra money after car insurance payments, money i owe my parents, and money set aside to visit my girlfriend once a month (At least I try to...)

Anyway, the thing is... I would love to be able to play test and constantly change up my deck and see what works and all of that but I barely have any decent cards outside of my main deck. Basically all I can do is do some research on what others are playing and put together a deck list that I like, then set a goal to slowly get those cards. It's basically a hit or miss. I can't afford to keep getting different cards. Playing Yu-Gi-Oh competitively would be great but it's hard to be, well versatile, in advancing my deck and skills.

Right now I have a deck list saved somewhere that I like and probably could be competitive; should I invest in completing the deck? I'm just worried that I won't be able to adapt to other people since my deck doesn't change at all, and I really have no side-deck worthy cards to speak of.

~Reader

A:

Your situation is tough I admit, but you are facing it with exactly the right attitude! You said yourself “Basically all I can do is do some research on what other are playing and put together a deck list that I like, then set a goal to slowly get those cards.” You’re actually at an advantage in your situation: You don’t have to keep buying cards to keep up with the game.

I was in your position once before when I lived in South Florida. I’ve always sued to alternatives to the better cards until I could actually afford decent cards one by one. It took me the better part of a year to get the cards I needed. Thankfully for you, you have Yugioh Virtual Desktop available to you for testing purposes (you can download it at www.xerocreative.com).

I’m very glad that you have set goals to attain the cards you need. An extremely valuable money saving tip is to set aside 1-10% of the amount each time you receive any money. Doing this will not only give you the money you need for your cards, but you would be surprised as to how fast this accumulates. In your specific case, go cash your check, take 1-10% of that amount (you decide) and put it in another bank account (which are easy and FREE to open) and NEVER touch it for 90 days. Just get into the habit of doing this EVERY TIME you get any kind of money. You’ll find that after 90 days you’ll have more money than you know what to do with. At the same time, you can use the rest of the cash leftover to buy cards, visit your girlfriend, pay your bills, etc. I do this every time I get paid and I’ve saved up quite a bit after just 4 weeks.

You have the right attitude and it’s ok to worry just a little bit. Don’t let this get worry get to you and keep looking forward toward your goals. You’ll get there faster once you start focusing on the results you have clearly envisioned in your mind.

In conclusion…

I’m sure that many of you feel what they feel or are in similar situations. Don’t let it get you down and focus on your goals.

If you have any questions about dueling success, goal-setting, team drama, etc. You can email me at deathjester86@gmail.com with your questions. Be sure to follow the appropriate format please:

• Full Name:
• UDE Number (if applicable):
• State or Country of residence:
• Question:

Until next time everyone! Remember to play hard, think about your moves, and most importantly…have fun!